


Sweet

by I_want_to_hunt_the_Moon



Category: Feverwake - Victoria Lee
Genre: Breakfast, Description of past self harm, Domestic Fluff, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, I can only write domestic fluff, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, It's very minor but don't read if you're triggered by that, Like they should be, M/M, Soft Boys, Specifically scratching, no beta we die like idiots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-05
Updated: 2020-10-05
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:42:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26732314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_want_to_hunt_the_Moon/pseuds/I_want_to_hunt_the_Moon
Summary: Noam handed him the plates and kissed him on the cheek. "I'll get the tea." Dara smiled at him and weaved around a begging Wolf to put the plates down, contentment blooming in his chest at the sound of Noam fiddling with the kettle, everything they did in this little sanctuary of theirs was so mundane yet new in a way that made Dara giddy with joy. "Here you go."Dara craned his head to catch his eyes so Noam could see him smile. "Thanks." Noam's eyes went soft and he bent down to kiss Dara's broadening smile, once, twice before Dara laughed and pushed him away. "Darling, I know I'm hard to resist but I'm trying to eat breakfast."
Relationships: Noam Álvaro/Dara Shirazi
Comments: 6
Kudos: 26





	Sweet

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sick and bored so now it's writing time
> 
> Someone stop me.

Dara woke up with the smell of vanilla lingering in his nose. He squeezed his eyes shut and took a deep breath through his mouth. _He is gone and you are not_. He still startled him when Noam shifted on his side of the bed, Dara didn't move when he slid his arms around Dara's shoulder and sighed, "Good mornin', baby."

"Hey," Dara croaked out.

He felt Noam frown against the back of his neck. "Everything alright?"

"Just a dream."

"'Bout him?" Dara didn't answer. Noam loosened his grip. "Are you okay?"

Dara nodded, cheek chafing against the pillow. "Yeah, I just need..." _A drink._ " a shower or something." _Alone_ , he didn't say but Noam understood anyway. Staying put and watching Dara carefully. Dara smiled and leaned forward to kiss his forehead. "I'll be back in a few." 

The smile dropped as soon as he closed the bathroom door but Noam didn't need to know that. He sighed again and peeled off his sticky pyjamas. He hated this, hated waking up with the memory of Lehrer's skin pressed against his own, hated how he never managed to fight back in his nightmares, how Lehrer just had to look at him and Dara knew down to his bones that he was completely alone.

It didn't matter anymore, Lehrer was gone and never getting out. People believed them this time, he wasn't getting away with it.

Still, Dara had to slam down to urge to start scratching himself, to get the memories off no matter the cost. He didn't want Noam to silently worry about the red marks left on his arms, didn't want the hesitant looks Noam tended to shoot him when he was going to say something Dara wouldn't like. How Noam would cradle his limb with both hands, press his lips against the scratches and gently urge him to please talk to his therapist about this.

It's difficult to break habits even if they are unhealthy. Dara would never admit it to Noam's face but sometimes he missed alcohol and counting calories and scratching. Missed digging his nails in and seeing his skin turn irritated and red and if it was truly bad, break. He was intimately familiar with the way the marks would fade but still be tender, how Dara could prod at them and hurt and how it tasted like control, how it didn't feel good but it felt better than nothing.

But he didn't do anything. Just watched the water run down his body as he tried to think of other things, like convincing Noam to get him a goat with arguments that weren't guilt trippy. He stepped out, ignoring the fact that he was dripping everywhere, and wrapped the softest towel he could find around himself out of sheer petulance. Fuck self-harm, he wasn't going to make cutting him down easy anymore, a dumb and immature thought but Dara was nothing if not stubborn.

Noam had started it, treating yourself well out of spite maybe as one last fuck you to Lehrer, and Dara was following his example apparently. He wrapped the towel around his waist and forced himself to meet his eyes in the mirror. The fog on the mirror made him look ghostly and frail, he made a face in response. He slid one hand over the stubble on his jaw, he had always hated shaving but it had to be done. He worked methodically, trying to ground himself in the steady movement of the razor and the dull clink as he tapped it against the sink before letting the water run over it. Ignoring the stray memories of his time with Lehrer that tried to butt in, how he had shown Dara how to at 13 and Dara had been ecstatic about the genuine bonding that was happening.

Idiot.

When he was done he padded over to the bedroom to see it empty except for Wolf. Dara scratched him between his ears. "I'm alright boy." The dog wagged his tail slowly before pushing himself up and strolling out of the room. Dara dropped the towel and pulled on some sweatpants and stole one of Noam's sweaters. He stretched his arms over his head and sighed deeply, inhaling the scent of something... burning? He rolled his eyes, muttering, "Of course." And made his way downstairs.

Noam was cursing under his breath while desperately stabbing a pan with a spatula. Dara smiled despite himself and soundlessly made his way over to press himself up against Noam's back and wrap his arms around Noam's waist. Noam jerked in surprise and almost dropped the pan on his foot. "Jesus! You scared me, baby."

Dara rested his cheek against Noam's back and smiled. "Sorry."

"No you're not."

Dara smiled and rubbed slow circles into Noam's stomach. "No I'm not." He pressed a kiss against Noam's neck and rested his chin on Noam's shoulder. "What are you making?"

"I'm making eggs."

"Why are they brown."

"Because I'm not good at making eggs."

"No you're not so let me just-" Dara moved to grab the spatula but Noam held it above his head.

"Ah, ah, ah I'm doing this for you."

"But I like cooking!"

"You can get the bacon then, if you want."

Dara rolled his eyes again. "So difficult," he mock whispered. Noam just smiled at him over his shoulder and Dara couldn't fight back the tiny smile he answered with. He got out the pan and set it down to heat up before throwing in the bacon, laughing as Noam kept leaning away every time it splashed. He fished out a piece with his bare fingers and bit into it just to see Noam's horrified expression.

"That's hot, babe. You're going to hurt yourself."

"I'm not." But Noam cradled his hand to kiss his fingertips anyway and when he licked his lips clean of grease Dara couldn't help but pull him close and kiss him.

Noam leaned into it, both hands resting on Dara's hips. "Mmh, the food's getting cold," he said with regret in his voice.

"Come on then."

Noam handed him the plates and kissed him on the cheek. "I'll get the tea." Dara smiled at him and weaved around a begging Wolf to put the plates down, contentment blooming in his chest at the sound of Noam fiddling with the kettle, everything they did in this little sanctuary of theirs was so mundane yet new in a way that made Dara giddy with joy. "Here you go."

Dara craned his head to catch his eyes so Noam could see him smile. "Thanks." Noam's eyes went soft and he bent down to kiss Dara's broadening smile, once, twice before Dara laughed and pushed him away. "Darling, I know I'm hard to resist but I'm trying to eat breakfast."

Noam grinned and held both hands up in surrender."Alright, alright." He stretched his arms over his head as he walked over to the other side of the table, making his shirt ride up. Dara watched him from the corner of his eye, torn between looking at his flexing biceps and the ink painting his side. He averted his gaze to the slightly burned eggs quickly, no need to give Noam an ego.

Noam slouched down into his seat. "How do you feel about me getting another tattoo?" Noam asked.

Dara raised an eyebrow at the bacon he was sliding on his plate. "It's your body, you can do whatever you want."

"I know, but I know you like them."

"You're delusional," Dara said curtly as he started cutting into his food. "I am completely indifferent towards them."

"Yeah?" Noam smirked.

"Yes."

"You sure?"

"Certain."

"You do seem to have a difficult time keeping your hands off me since I got them."

Dara shrugged. "I always had a difficult time keeping my hands off you, I don't know what you're talking about."

"Aw, baby. You're sweet this morning."

"I'm always sweet," Dara snapped. Noam gave him a disbelieving look. "What?"

"You can be kinda mean."

Dara sighed. "I know."

Noam's ankle bumped his gently as he leaned forward to give Dara a better look at his earnest expression. "I know you're working on it, I was just teasing."

"I know," Dara said softly.

Noam leaned back again. "So, another tattoo."

"What are you thinking of?"

"Something with stars to remember you, if that's okay."

Dara hoped that his cheeks weren't as hot as they felt as he pushed his food around his plate. "You already have the flowers on your thigh to remember me."

"I do, but I want another something and you love the stars."

"If we ever break up you are screwed." 

"If we ever break up, which I won't ever want, I would still want to remember you."

Noam was so unbearably sincere that Dara had to look away. "Stop looking at me like that."

"Like what?"

"All soft and loving."

"But you're beautiful and I love you."

Dara put his hands over his cheeks in embarrassment. "Noam!"

"Are you shy? Oh, baby." He heard Noam laugh. "I'll stop, I promise. Just look at me."

Dara flitted his eyes back to him and Noam did the same stupid thing with his face, something that made his lips curve upwards and his face relax and his eyes turned so, so tender. "You're doing it again."

"I'm sorry, I just love you a lot."

Dara wanted to roll his eyes or kick Noam under the table but instead he just shifted in his chair. "I love you too."

Noam leaned forward with a teasing grin. "What was that?"

Dara pushed himself upward and leaned over the table to kiss him quickly. "I said: I love you too."

Noam had a dazed look on his face. "Oh."

He sat back down. "Don't act surprised."

"No, it's just- it's nice to hear you say it."

 _He hasn't heard it often._ "I will have to say it more then." Dara shot Noam a small smile and steadily ignored the butterflies in his stomach. "So, where would you want it?"

"Huh?" Noam asked through a mouthful of egg.

Dara scrunched his nose. "The tattoo, silly."

"Oh." Noam chewed thoughtfully for a moment and then shrugged. "I don't know, forearm maybe. Somewhere where I can easily look at it."

"Sap," Dara accused.

Noam's lips pulled up in a slow grin. "Only for you, baby." 

"I said stop."

"I can't help that you are perfect."

"If you keep this up I'm not letting you leave the bed for a while."

Noam leaned his cheek into his hand with a shameless grin. "Is that supposed to be a threat, baby? 'Cause it's accomplishing quite the opposite."

Dara arched an eyebrow. "You say that now but I'm not the one who's pleading for mercy after round one."

Noam pouted. "I was tired. And I don't understand how your libido is that high because that shit's supernatural."

Dara shrugged. "I am the definition of high maintenance, darling."

"Oh, I know." Noam said with a smile so teasing there was no sting behind his words. Then he frowned. "Not hungry?"

"Oh." Dara looked down at his uneaten plate. "No, just distracted." He dug in quickly. "It's good."

"Thanks." They continued to eat in comfortable silence. Dara watched Noam excitedly shove food into his face and shook his head. Messy boy. "Want to go on a run later?" Noam asked with earnest eyes.

Dara wasn't stupid, he knew full well that Noam was trying to distract him from his dream but the efforts were endearing and they made something in Dara's chest glow. "I would like that." Noam was still looking at him. "What's with the staring today?"

"I'm sorry, I don't know what's gotten into me. I just..." 

Dara reached a hand over the table and Noam took it gladly, rubbing his thumb over the back. "I know."

"Wanna go on a date afterwards?"

"Aren't we spontaneous today."

"We haven't been on one in a while, we can go to the coffeeshop you like, have lunch there, take Wolf to the park and then we'll go to the planetarium or something."

Dara bit his lip but he couldn't stop his smile, excitement swirled in his stomach. "That sounds nice."

"That was easy."

"You really think you need to convince me to spend time with you?"

Noam shrugged. "I have been told by many sources that I am infuriating."

"Your sources are correct, darling." Noam put a hand to his chest and started to pout. "You know it's true."

"Yeah," Noam laughed. "And you love me for it."

"I love you for it."

Noam raised their intertwined hands to his lips so he could kiss Dara's knuckles. "I want today to be a good day."

"I think it will be."

And in the gentle gold of the morning light he believed himself.

**Author's Note:**

> So my head canon for Noam's tattoos are a Phoenix on his side bc they are cool and also nice symbolism. Flowers on his upper thigh bc Dara loves flowers and they are cute.
> 
> ty camii for helping me figure out a sentence.
> 
> Also im so sorry to people who don't like my writing bc its a small fandom and you don't have much choice but it is what it is.  
> (Did y'all know there's a difference between bend and bent? Why did no one tell me I have to revise all my works)


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